Processing Pain

October 18, 2015 No Comments »
Processing Pain

By Kelly Carr 

Screen Shot 2015-07-30 at 3.25.16 PMThough we are all affected in some way by pain, sometimes it’s tough to verbalize. It may not be our own pain—we see loved ones suffering and we feel worried and frustrated and powerless to fix it all at the same time. How do we process all that’s going on?


It helps to hear the testimonies of others who are willing to share what they’ve experienced. We can see examples of steps forward and be reminded of the great hope God gives us.

My hope is that this week and next week, our topics get you talking. If you can relate to the testimonies shared by these authors about death, physical illness, and mental illness, I hope you find the courage to share your own experiences with someone. Sharing will likely help you in some way. Sharing will likely help others.


In this spirit of sharing, I’ll start. I often process my feelings of pain through writing:

Fourth Winter

Three winters in a row
Three winters filled with woe
Friend then friend then family
Those once close now lost to me
The winter cold has cut like ice
My spirit it has shattered thrice
A fourth winter, dawning soon
Brings more bad news, impending gloom
For word has spread of illness near
Though hope I have, inside I fear
Another loss I cannot bear
Another piece my heart can’t spare
With bated breath, each moment ticks
We pray and close together stick
The doctors finish, all is good
Rest assured, and now I could
But one surprising phone call rang
Out of nowhere, death still came
A church friend, found all alone
Headed to eternal home
Though one is spared, on earth remains
Another soul sings Heav’n’s refrain
I look upon the hardened ground
In graying skies no comfort found
In winter here my heart does ache
The tears it brings, the breath it takes
Yet winter now, it cannot last
Warming spring will push it past
Spring thaws my heart and does renew
New life abounds like morning dew
Nature shines with beautied earth
And gives my hope a second birth
For just as we will, destined, die
In my Savior trust will lie

Three years in a row, at the end of January/beginning of February, I lost someone close to me. I feared when my mom was diagnosed with a brain tumor this past January. I couldn’t handle it if she was gone also. A huge praise to the Lord, she had surgery and is doing very well. Yet that same week, another friend died unexpectedly to mark a fourth winter in a row of grief.

I thank God for amazing family and friends with whom I can share things. I hope you find the same for your pain.

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